“Just in case you ever feel its absence…know happiness always returns.”
In my new book, Choosing the Life You Were Born to Live, I talk about the path to finding joy in your life. The Ancient Egyptians believed that when we die and are at the gates of heaven, we are asked two questions:
Have you found joy in your life?
Has your life brought joy to others?
I am a firm advocate in the belief that you cannot give what you do not have. If you are not happy (joyful) how can you possibly bring joy to others? If the gas tank on your car is empty, your car cannot take you anywhere, right? The same is true for you. If you are “empty,” you have nothing to give. So how do you “fill your tank?”
Stephen Covey has a great list of “12 things happy people do differently” that has been circulating on Facebook recently. I thought I would share it with you today as a reminder of some action steps you can take to be in a state of joy. (I embellished these a little with my own thoughts.)
1. Express gratitude – be thankful for what you have in your life instead of always focusing on what you do not have.
2. Cultivate optimism – your perception is your reality. Think optimistically and your world will follow.
3. Avoid comparing yourself to others – when you compare yourself to others, the nature of the human mind is that you will always be sure to come up short. The only person who you should be comparing yourself to is yourself in the past. Are you moving forward?
4. Practice random acts of kindness – help someone anonymously today.
5. Nurture social relationships – the nature of your relationships with others tells you a lot about the relationship you currently have with yourself. Our relationships are the things that matter most to us in the end. Make them worth it.
6. Develop strategies for coping – know what you need to do to stay centered. What are those things you do that make you feel better when your external world is in chaos?
7. Learn to forgive – open your heart and forgive others and yourself. Forgiveness is admitting that we are all alike in some way, shape and form.
8. Increase flow experiences – in other words, know your strengths. Do those things that “flow” and come easiest to you.
9. Savor life’s joys – stay in the present moment. Life is about the journey, not the end point.
10. Commit to your intentions – know what you want and commit to getting it. Direct your life in the direction YOU want instead of your life and external circumstances directing you.
11. Practice spirituality – recognize that life is bigger than you are and that there is a higher plan. Get in touch with your higher self and the potential that is deep inside. You know your gifts…practice them!
12. Take care of your body – your body houses the soul. It is your temple. Care for it, honor it and respect it.
Your happiness is your responsibility…no one else’s.
“Happiness depends upon ourselves.” ~Aristotle
Smiling,
Chris
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
“Choosing the Life You Were Born to Live: How Changing Your Thoughts Will Change Your Life” by Chris Sopa published by Balboa Press.
“Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn’t have the time to sit around and talk about you. What’s important to me is not others’ opinions of me, but what’s important to me is my opinion of myself.” ~C. Joy Bell
Self Love Poem by Charlie Chaplin
As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering
are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth.
Today, I know, this is “AUTHENTICITY”.
As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody
As I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time
was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this
person was me. Today I call it “RESPECT”.
As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life,
and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow.
Today I call it “MATURITY”.
As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance,
I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens
at the exactly right moment. So I could be calm.
Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE”.
As I began to love myself I quit steeling my own time,
and I stopped designing huge projects for the future.
Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do
and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in
my own rhythm. Today I call it “SIMPLICITY”.
As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for
my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything that drew
me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude
a healthy egoism. Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF”.
As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since
I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is “MODESTY”.
As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry
about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING
is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT”.
As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me
and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my
mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this
connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART”.
We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems
with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing
new worlds are born. Today I know THAT IS “LIFE”!
Take the time to do one thing for yourself today.
Love yourself and do it for YOU,
Chris
(Thank you Elaine!)
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
Click here to purchase your copy of “Choosing The Life You Were Born to Live: How Changing Your Thoughts Will Change Your Life” by Chris Sopa
I was blessed to spend the entire weekend with 30 amazing women at the 2nd annual Goddess Conference at the Peaceful Spirit Enrichment Center owned and operated by Melanie Dunlap (an amazing “new” female). As I sat among these fabulously gifted and beautiful women, I began to think about the similarities between all of us. What makes us so unique? Why do we seem “different” than the average woman?
The feminine energy is in a time of becoming empowered once again. Women are stepping into more leadership positions, more women are becoming entrepreneurs than ever and women are changing the old paradigm of what “being a woman” means in this new age.
What constitutes this “new feminine” energy? I decided to find out. I watched, listened and asked several women this weekend what they thought made us all alike. This is what I gathered about the “new feminine.”
The “new feminine” is:
“If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.” ~ Katharine Hepburn
To all of my “AZ Goddesses” – Love you all!
Chris
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
Click here to Purchase your copy of “Choosing the Life You Were Born to Live: How Changing Your Thoughts will Change Your Life“
Choose Your Illusion Wisely“I believe that everything and everyone is healed right now. I choose to focus on this truth instead of on illusions of fear.”
Everyone has seen a magician at some point in their life. David Copperfield is my all time favorite. I still remember watching when he made the Statue of Liberty disappear.
Even though I do believe in magic, or some may call it miracles, I also know that the brain is an amazing organ. With a small shift in attention and focus, an entire reality can change…making a several ton statue in the middle of one of the busiest cities in the world seem like it disappeared. Did it really disappear or were you just distracted enough to shift your attention?
Where we place our attention is the very energy that creates the reality we see in our lives. Do you look around and see hatred or love? Do you see the good in people or only judge the bad? Do you choose to focus on what can go wrong or what can possibly go right?
The way to change what we see in the world is simply with one thought at a time. Reacting to others programmed behaviors only keeps us all in the same energy that got us here in the first place. Be the one to shift your attention first. Change the “illusion” and create a new reality. If so many follow such a negative one, as we have created, imagine what would happen if someone, anyone, shifted their attention to a positive illusion?
If you are going to be living in an illusion anyway, why not choose one of healing and joy rather than fear? Why not choose one that is your own that benefits all of mankind so we can finally come out of the darkness we have created?
No harm shall befall you, my friend, for Divine Presence attends your way and guards you into The All Good.
Loving kindness awaits you at every turn of Life’s road.
Guidance is yours along the pathway of experience,
And an Infallible Power protects you.
~Ernest Holmes, “The Science of Mind”
Living in a beautiful “illusion” of my creation,
Chris
Purchase your copy of Chris Sopa’s new book, “Choosing the Life You Were Born to Live: How Changing Your Thoughts will Change Your Life” published by Balboa Press.
“In memory of Nancy Oberlin Bestwick and Dr. David Hawkins”
“In this interconnected universe, every improvement we make in our private world improves the world at large for everyone. We all float on the collective level of consciousness of mankind, so that any increment we add comes back to us. We all add to our common buoyancy by our efforts to benefit life. It is a scientific fact that what is good for you is good for me.” ~Dr. David Hawkins
A couple months before my Dad passed away from cancer in 2007, he said something to me I will never forget. One night as we sat in the living room of the house I grew up in, he looked over at me and said, “I hope when I die I am alone. I don’t want anyone to remember me dying…I want them to remember me living.”
There are certain points on “the journey of life” that are meant to be walked alone. Which points? We are not made privy to that information, but when the time comes, we know it. It may be after the loss of a loved one, at your own death, after a divorce, after a job loss, after recovery from an addiction or even before a significant yet unknown event is supposed to occur in your life. Regardless, being alone is mandatory. For some journeys God gives you only one seat.
Being alone is one of the biggest lessons we can learn as humans. Being alone is not easy…it is tough. You are left alone with YOU. No distractions, no one to get another opinion from, no one to tell you the “right” thing to do…no one. Feelings arise that come out of nowhere. Feelings of fear, loneliness, despair, or anxiety. Yes, at times we all enjoy being alone – self-time if you will – but being alone when you don’t necessarily want to be, now that is where true lessons are born.
To appreciate anything in life we must experience polarities. In order to know you like the company of others, you must have been alone at some time. To know happiness you must also at one time had to know sadness. The opposite of something is a part of that something – its opposite makes it whole. In order to be “whole,” we must savor each experience AND it’s opposite. A whole breath includes the inhale and the exhale…without either one, there would be no wholeness of breath.
One of the greatest illusions we have is that of individuality. According to Dr. David Hawkins in his brilliant book, “Power vs. Force,” “the illusion of individuality is the origin of all suffering – when one realizes that one IS the universe, complete and at one with all that is, forever without end, then no further suffering is possible.”
The individual that is YOU has a very unique purpose. You must have the entire experience of being human, which includes time alone, to learn, recapitulate events, reflect, pray and experience the wholeness of your soul being incarnated into this beautiful human body. If you find yourself alone now, as I do, don’t allow yourself to give into the feelings of loneliness. You are far from alone. Each moment is as it is meant to be. Savor it for what it is and allow the feelings and the experience to take you to places of this human experience you have not known before. Learn from it, love it and above all, love yourself. You are the only one that will ever always be there for you. Others come and go…you stay. Be the best you that you can possibly be and use your alone time to sharpen the blade, oil the engine and give yourself a needed tune-up. Sleep, study, read, observe, pray, meditate, walk, experience the beauty of nature, reflect, work, don’t work, sing, dance, paint, sculpt, cry, laugh, run, take a bath, do absolutely nothing.
Whatever you do, as you find yourself alone, remember…one is a whole number.
(Thanks Nancy!)
“It’s my contention that the universe not only will, but must provide you with what you conceive of. So if you complain about what is missing from your life – you will be offered experiences that match that energy.” ~Dr. Wayne Dyer
Love you,
Chris
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Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
Purchase your copy of Choosing the Life You Were Born to Live by Christine Sopa
Lose Balance=Lose PowerNo matter how far you have gone wrong, you can always turn around.
Balance is a myth. Yes, you heard me correctly. It is a myth…at least a myth in the way you think of balance. Most believe balance is an even 50/50 split of work and home life. Last time I checked, there were many other things that made up a person’s life besides home and work; social activities, spirituality, physical and mental health, etc. If you are doing one thing and thinking you should be doing another thing…that is a sure sign you are “out of balance.”
There are many reasons why we lose balance in our lives. Too much on our plates, doing what others think we should do rather than what we want to do, letting negative thoughts about the “what ifs” take you over…but the number one reason we lose balance is because we have lost power to something or someone. Losing power equates to a loss in feeling good. When you feel any one of a number of “bad” feelings, somewhere you have lost power. Power can be lost to a person, a thing, a place, or a thought. The good news is that once you are aware that you have lost power you can call it back by regaining the balance in your life.
How do you regain balance? If that isn’t the golden question, I don’t know what is! Balance comes back into alignment when you identify what is important in your life at this moment (your priorities) and you spend your time and energy doing those things. We lose balance when we are spending our time on things that we do not feel are important to us at the moment…necessary maybe, but not “important.” Let me define “important” here; important equates to a thing or a person you feel is worthy of your time that when you give your energy to, it makes you feel fulfilled and satisfied inside.
What is important to you today may not be as important to you in a month. Things and people change. You change. Change is the only constant we have in life. Get used to it. Every month revisit the priorities in your life and not only make sure they are the same, but assess your behaviors and make sure they are a match to those priorities.
What are your top priorities right now? Not your “to do” list…put that away. I want to see your backbone here, not your wishbone! What makes your heart skip a beat when you think about it? What area of your life is in the most turmoil right now? Where in your life do you often get confused and feel as if you never make the right decision? These answers are a clue to the direction in which the Universe is pointing you. Use your feelings as a guide. Where are your feelings guiding you? What feels good when you do it? What thoughts consume your attention all day long?
Take some time to write down your top three priorities and then create balance in your life by aligning your actions to those priorities. When your feelings drop, realize you lost power and call it back by doing something that will make you feel good again.
Know today that you deserve to have a balanced life. It is ok to have and experience good things. There is no need to feel guilty because you have something someone else does not. We are all on our own journeys. We walk the same road but we are all on different mile markers. Some are ahead and some are behind. Those ahead are not “better” and those behind are not “slower.” We are at the exact mile marker we should be. When you get lost on the road of life, pull over (rest), look at your map (your priorities), turn around if you need to (set different priorities) and get back on the road (re-engage in life - take action).
Remember…we are all walking on the same road. Make it a good “road trip.” 😉
Once you become aware of something that is limiting you, you then have the power to change it.
Calling back my power,
Chris
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
25 Things You Can Do To Alleviate Stress
I am about to make a bold statement…stress is the main and only cause of all illnesses! Everything we experience in our physical world is simply a projection of what we are allowing to run through our minds. Our thoughts create our reality. If your thoughts are “sick,” you will be sick.
We all know people who are wonderful individuals who are very positive and have great lives but still get ill. How can this be? Our conscious mind may be positive, but our subconscious mind runs 90% of our behaviors. We are not always aware what sits in that deep recess of the mind. One of the ways God gets our attention, if all else fails, is through our physical body. A physical ailment will stop you in your tracks every time and cause you to question your life, your thinking and your actions.
If you do nothing else for yourself in this lifetime, do this: learn how to manage stress in your life. Contrary to what you may now believe, stress is not caused by your ex, your boss, lack of money, lack of sex, having no job, etc. Stress is caused by your perception of those events in your life. Change your perception and you change the “movie.”
Here are 25 things off the top of my head I have done in the past to alleviate stress. Feel free to leave comments and add to the list. Let’s all help each other!
“Faith is the power to stand up to the madness and chaos of the physical world while holding the position that nothing external has any authority over what heaven has in mind for you.“ ~Caroline Myss
Desserts…desert…I always get confused! Lol!
Chris
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
“Life is Like a Box of Chocolates” (or Hot Chocolate in this case!)“It makes no difference how many peaks you reach if there was no pleasure in the climb“.
~Oprah Winfrey
A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired. During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guest hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups – porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite – telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.
When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said, “Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. The cup that you are drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups…and then you began eyeing each other’s cups.
Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate. God makes the hot chocolate, man chooses the cups. The happiest people don’t have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything they have.
Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Enjoy your hot chocolate.
Enjoying every sip,
Chris
Chris Sopa is founder and owner of Chris Sopa International, Inc. You can learn more about her at www.ChrisSopa.com. Find her at Facebook.com/ChrisSopaInternational, Twitter @ChrisSopa, LinkedIn, and Google+.
