Sometimes You Have to Leave “Home Base”

“Humans cannot exist if everything that is unpleasant is eliminated instead of understood. When the unwelcome comes, surrender.”
~Marlo Morgan, ?Mutant Message Down Under?

I grew up playing softball. I loved it too! I started when I was about 7 years old and I have to say, I was pretty good at it. I tried my hand at first base, third base, catcher, and then finally ended up as a pitcher. When I came up to bat, the outfield took a few steps back. Softball is an interesting game?a ball gets thrown at you and you have to try to hit that ball with a skinny bat. Once the ball is hit, you have to leave home base and run! The hope is that you don?t get called out before you make it back home.

As I embark on my travels overseas, I cannot help but compare my life at the moment to a softball game. I know that sounds weird but I have thought about the parallels several times. My game began when I ?ran? from my home base to experience an adventure that required faith and for me to put fear aside, much like when you are up to bat and excitement and fear are running through your body at the same time. My equipment is two suitcases and a backpack instead of a bat, ball, and glove. My ?game plan? for my trip is very similar to the strategy ball players go over in their heads right before they are up for bat. My strategy included where I wanted to go (much like deciding where to hit the ball in the field when you are up to bat), how far I wanted to go (do I want to hit a home run or just hit a double??or maybe purposely allow myself to get called out to help another player advance?), and moving from country to country (running from base to base).

It is scary to leave ?home base.? Home base is where you are comfortable and surrounded by the people and things you know. As humans, we like to feel comfortable. We tend to dismiss and even try to eliminate the uncomfortable hoping to hold on to the last bit of control over our lives that we perceive we have. There is one problem with comfortableness?it does not allow us to grow.

Visiting the elephant sanctuary was one of the highlights of my trip to Thailand.

I would be lying if I told you that my trip so far has been all candy and roses. Honestly, I have really been struggling. Trust me, I know how blessed I am that I have the means and the opportunity to travel but blessed does not coincide with easy. There are times in our lives when the lessons that we are ready to learn cannot be learned in the place we reside?this can mean your home base, your job, your relationship, etc. This I knew, which is why I decided to embark on this journey. I was feeling unsettled and way too comfortable for too long and knew I was not growing. Frankly, I was bored with my life. My yearning to venture away was my soul trying to communicate to me that it was time for the next chapter. This yearning came in the form of emotions. So, I did what most of us do and questioned what I was feeling and tried to justify it so I did not have to change and feel uncomfortable. First, I thought I was crazy, then I thought I was menopausal, then I questioned whether I was running from something I did not want to face, and finally, I realized that I was being called to do something different that could not be done from where I was sitting. How we feel is everything and the actions we take are our way of expressing the intent of our emotions. Faith and fear cannot exist together. When one is present the other one cannot express itself. So, I decided to choose faith in the unknown rather than give into the fear I was feeling.

It is amazing who you see on the streets when walking in Chiang Mai!

As I end my time in Thailand and head ?down under? to Australia, here are some things I have realized so far:

Blessed to spend time with my good friend Beverly in Chiang Mai. We had not seen each other for 10 years!
  • We are so busy “doing” all of the time that we forget to just be. We are human beings, after all, not human doings! I have learned that I do not need to be doing something all the time to feel productive. Sitting and just enjoying my surroundings is healing and productive in and of itself (and it is very challenging at first!).
  • I have had to learn to feel secure and at home when I am in an unfamiliar place. Making wherever I am ?home? in whatever way I can has become key. I have even had to revamp my definition of home. Home for me now is the feeling of inner peace I have or that I can create wherever in the world I may be. I have released ?home? as being only a physical place.
  • Skugga Estate…a coffee and chocolate farm I would gladly call “home!”
    Me and my Skugga Estate guide Sam (a chocolate expert from Switzerland) – who I think is a Jeremy Renner look-a-like! 🙂

    I truly feel as if we have many lives in our one lifetime. We have chapters that are amazing and ones that are tragic. We have ones where we learn lessons and others where we get to use the lessons we learned. I believe our life on Earth is a school and we learn and are tested along the way. The only way we can pass any test while we are here is to take it. As I continue on my Earth school journey and head to Australia next, I can?t help but think of the kangaroo, the snake, and the dolphin. I have made these animals my spirit animals?

    The kangaroo is incapable of stepping backward. It can only go forward.

    The snake frequently removes its outer skin (the old self being replaced by the new self).

    The dolphin sees all life as a fun adventure.

    The Elephant Parade started its journey in Thailand and now these beautifully painted elephants travel throughout the world!

    As I round third base during the world series game of my travels, I remain open to whatever this chapter wants to teach me and I am committed to being fully present as I am called to bat on whatever adventure is presented to me along the way.

    See you down under,

    Me at my own private Thanksgiving dinner!


    Rebuilding Temples

    “I looked in temples, churches, and mosques. But I found the Divine within my heart.” ~Rumi

    One of my rituals upon arriving in a new location is to check out my surroundings by taking a walk. Walking down the busy street of Nimman Rd. in Chiang Mai, Thailand I could not help but notice there was a temple every two blocks. Literally, there was a temple every two blocks! (I later learned that there are hundreds of temples throughout the city). Of course, since this was my first “temple rodeo” in Thailand I stopped at the first two or three to take in the beauty and awe of my surroundings. It was during my third temple visit that I met Mr. Noi. Mr. Noi was an elderly gentleman who was a retired tour operator and offered to take me on a tour of a couple of other temples in the area. One of the benefits of traveling alone is that people are not afraid to talk to you. I meet so many wonderful people on my solo travels! It was Mr. Noi who told me about the lantern festival. The lantern festival in Thailand is a yearly tradition that happens every November (the 12th month of their calendar year). Flaming lanterns are sent soaring into the sky and others are sent floating in the sea. The burning and releasing of the lanterns symbolize letting go of all the old pains, challenges, obstacles, etc. of this last year and welcoming new abundance, prosperity, and happiness. This is something I have seen in pictures and would have kicked myself if I had missed it. So grateful for Mr. Noi!

    Floating lanterns in the water at the festival

    Needless to say, I immediately bought a ticket for the first night of the festival. For the first couple of hours, I gorged on endless amounts of Thai food, watched beautiful traditional dances, and listened to the monks chanting in preparation for the lantern ritual. As I sat in the crowd of 3600 people, I found it odd that no one was giving instructions on how to light the lanterns. These lanterns were a good 3 feet tall and 2 feet wide and made entirely of paper mache with a ring the size of a grapefruit at the bottom that is supposed to be set on fire. I guess I thought that the ring would be easy to catch on fire and once it was lit, the lantern would magically take off. Nope. Apparently, there is a trick to the trade that many of us non-locals did not know. The lanterns work like a hot air balloon. Heat must build up in the lantern before it is able to float. To build up this heat, once the ring is lit, you are supposed to bring the lantern slowly to the ground until enough heat builds and the lantern floats away.

    There were many factors that played into the tragedy of that night. One, many people did not know how to light the lanterns correctly so lanterns were catching fire before they were ready to take off into the sky. Two, it was an extremely windy night. Three, every decoration was made up of flammable material. And fourth, hay barrels were everywhere for people to sit on as chairs.

    It was when my friend Jen who was lighting her lanterns on the other side of the crowd texted me saying, “So, we may die!” that I noticed it. As everyone was busy trying to figure out how to light their lanterns, no one noticed that a lantern hit the beautifully constructed temple in the middle of the crowd and set it on fire (Click the link below to watch the video and you will see the beautiful lanterns going off into the sky and then as I pan over the temple, you will see it on fire – and you will hear me repeatedly yelling “Oh shit!” – LOL!).

    IMG_8801_lantern video

    What was interesting about that moment was the first thing I thought was that it was done as part of the ritual. I remember thinking to myself, “Huh, wow, they even set the temple on fire. I wonder what that is all about?” Then I realized it wasn’t part of the ritual and my life flashed before my eyes. I immediately high-tailed it to the very small parking lot anticipating that very soon the 3600 people at the event with me would realize what was going on and there would be a stampede. As I quickly walked out of the circle of fire, I noticed that the beautiful tree that was filled with colorful paper lanterns was also going up in flames. My pace quickened.

    Burning temple

    I made it out OK and to my knowledge, so did everyone else and no one was hurt. On the shuttle ride home, I remember thinking that I was so glad I bought a ticket for the first night because obviously there was not going to be a second night due to the fire. Not only did the second night go off without a hitch but they rebuilt the temple in a day! THEY REBUILT THE TEMPLE IN A DAY! And, apparently on the second night, they continually gave instructions on how to correctly light the lanterns to the crowd (yes, we learn from our mistakes!).

    The formal definition of a temple is a “building” devoted to worship or a place gods or objects of religious reverence reside. Temples are not something that is a common site if you grew up in the United States. We may see the occasionally mosque, but there is not a temple every two blocks. I grew up Catholic and remember always hearing that our body is our temple. Our body houses a very precious gift…our soul. It also houses our emotions, wisdom, thoughts, and memories. These are our sacred “gifts” that must be protected at all costs.

    Gold Temple in Chiang Rai

    There are times in our lives when some of our gifts get accidentally “burned down”…we get hurt by someone we love, we find out we are ill, or a horrible memory haunts us. Sometimes, like in my case, we set fire to our own temples. We realize that we may have been paying reverence to something or someone that no longer serves us…this may be a job, a relationship, or even the place we live. I did not literally burn my apartment down in Scottsdale, but I “burned down” my life there in hope of finding another flicker or flame that would guide me to where I was supposed to be next. All I knew was that I did not belong there anymore. I could feel it. The Phoenix bird rebirths itself from the flames. The Thai monks rebuild temples in a day to give reverence to their gods on a holy day. They do whatever it takes to make this happen.

    Wat Huay Pla Kang Temple in Chiang Rai

    One of the reasons I travel so much is that I am on a quest for being awed. I love being awed by life and people! During my time in Malaysia, Bali, and Thailand I have been in absolute awe at the reverence and loyalty the people of these cultures show to their religion and the beautiful temples I have seen. In Malaysia, which is primarily Muslim, you hear their prayers 5-6 times a day over a loudspeaker. In Bali, which is primarily Hindu, you hear their prayers religiously at 6:00 am, noon, and 6:00 pm. Not to mention the time they spend daily making offerings that they leave at their temples, places of work, and homes. And in Thailand, which is primarily Buddhist, watching these amazing people stop what they are doing, walk into one of the many temples, bow, and sit silently in prayer in the middle of their day leaves me in awe.

    The Blue Temple

    My witnessing of these awe-inspiring moments in Thailand has made me realize that at any moment there can be a death and an instantaneous rebirth. It is all part of the cycle of life. We may not have control over what departs our lives all the time, but we do have the power to rebirth our lives whenever we choose. It is simply a choice. I am not saying that choice is easy, but it is there for us when we are ready to step into it. It just takes a little courage, a lot of faith, and sometimes a flame to get us moving. (wink-wink)

    Kop Kun Ka,


    The creepy sculptured hands and skulls that greet you upon entering the White Temple.